Why Don't I Jam?
I once received news of the death of a relative while jamming and I haven't been able to jam since
I once proposed to, and was rejected by, the derby love of my life while jamming; as a consequence I'm now a sworn derby spinster AND no longer jam
Once, while I was jamming, a toddler ran out on the track and I went straight over it like it was a speed bump. The baby survived but the puppy it was carrying was not so lucky. I now refuse to jam in memory of that puppy
I once found out I was pregnant while jamming and the baby wasn't mine
I was such an awesomely fast jammer that my tattoo flew off during a jam and I can't afford to keep getting it tattooed back on
Once, while jamming, a Liberal government led by Tony Abbott came into power. They ensured some of my team mates couldn't marry who they loved, cut services to those who need it most, contributed to the degradation of the natural environment and otherwise caused Australia to become an international embarrassment. I only jam if lefties are in power
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