How Do You Plan On Celebrating Your Freedom This July 4th?
By taking the wife and kids to the park, where I'll momentarily reflect on how I ironically lost all of my freedom the day I decided to get married and have kids.
My wife is a pregnant pig right now, so I'll probably take some shrooms and get a little weird with her sister. Oh, and fireworks.
I'm wearing my Redskins jersey at a casino. Freedom of speech, bitch.
I'm a homosexual, so I'll probably just watch some soccer.
I'm sorry. I was under the impression that this was a sports blog.
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