How Should We Cheer Up B.Crys?
Hire somebody to play something beautiful for him on a very small violin
Build him a time machine so he can go back to a simpler time and not be so frightened
Program his TV so it will only play The Big Bang Theory and Two and a Half Men
Start a Kickstarter to buy him a mansion in Russia where he'll never have gay stuff shoved in his face again
Buy him tickets to a Nickelback concert
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