Jim changed himself so Eilis would like him, Tony didn’t have to change anything and Eilis fell in love with him. Jim represented who Eilis used to be, where she used to live, who she used to hang out with, where she could have worked, and her sister that will never come back. Tony represented the place where she was making something of herself and had the room to grow into a person she never could have been in Ireland. Jim was kind and treated her well, but he was quiet and reserved, just like Eilis used to be, not who she was anymore. Tony complimented her personality and pushed her to step out of her comfort zone. Jim let her feel like she could fall back into her comfort zone (her old life). And the part about Tony freaking out and writing her multiple letters when she was in Ireland, I would hope anyone who’s very recent wife just traveled on a boat thousands of miles away would write more than one letter and be a little worried when their wife only wrote back once. It’s not the age of cellphones where he could call at anytime and see how she was, given her sister JUST DIED. He knew how sad she was and how sad her mother was without anyone there. It’s given that he would be a little worried that she might feel like she owed her mother something by staying in Ireland. Not to mention she was gone for over a month and he heard from her one time. Tony was as patience as any young man madly in love would be. Jim was great, but he didn’t make Eilis great, while she did that herself, it was really influenced by Tony. And above all Eilis loved Tony, not Jim.
Jim changed himself so Eilis would like him, Tony didn’t have to change anything and Eilis fell in love with him. Jim represented who Eilis used to be, where she used to live, who she used to hang out with, where she could have worked, and her sister that will never come back. Tony represented the place where she was making something of herself and had the room to grow into a person she never could have been in Ireland. Jim was kind and treated her well, but he was quiet and reserved, just like Eilis used to be, not who she was anymore. Tony complimented her personality and pushed her to step out of her comfort zone. Jim let her feel like she could fall back into her comfort zone (her old life). And the part about Tony freaking out and writing her multiple letters when she was in Ireland, I would hope anyone who’s very recent wife just traveled on a boat thousands of miles away would write more than one letter and be a little worried when their wife only wrote back once. It’s not the age of cellphones where he could call at anytime and see how she was, given her sister JUST DIED. He knew how sad she was and how sad her mother was without anyone there. It’s given that he would be a little worried that she might feel like she owed her mother something by staying in Ireland. Not to mention she was gone for over a month and he heard from her one time. Tony was as patience as any young man madly in love would be. Jim was great, but he didn’t make Eilis great, while she did that herself, it was really influenced by Tony. And above all Eilis loved Tony, not Jim.