I found myself questioning the wrong things. It does suggest a nice little conflict of social expectations but I wondered if the female character was a child when she didn't know what 'mesmerize' meant. But then I realized she was probably an older girl.
I found myself questioning the wrong things. It does suggest a nice little conflict of social expectations but I wondered if the female character was a child when she didn't know what 'mesmerize' meant. But then I realized she was probably an older girl.
I think this needs bit more setting than it has.